| Log On: | Making the wood stove hotter. |
| Log Off: | Don't add wood. |
| Monitor: | Keep an eye on the wood stove. |
| Download: | Getting the firewood off the pickup. |
| Mega Hertz: | When you're not careful downloading (watch the toes!) |
| Floppy Disk: | What you get from carrying too much wood. |
| RAM: | The hydraulic thingy that makes the woodsplitter work. |
| Hard Drive: | Getting home in mud season. |
| Prompt: | What you wish the mail was in mud season. |
| Windows: | What to shut when it's 30 below. |
| Screen: | What you need for mosquito season. |
| Byte: | What mosquitos do. |
| Chip: | What to munch on. |
| Micro Chip: | What's left in the bag when the chips are gone. |
| Infrared: | Where the leftovers go when Fred's around. |
| Modem: | What you did to the hay fields. |
| Dot Matrix: | Farmer Matrix's wife. |
| Lap Top: | Where little kids feel comfy. |
| Keyboard: | Where you hang your keys. |
| Software: | Plastic eating utensils. |
| Mouse: | What eats the horses' grain in the barn. |
| Main Frame: | The part of the barn that holds the roof up. |
| Port: | Fancy wine. |
| Enter: | C'mon in! |
| Random Access Memory: | You can't remember how much that new rifle cost when your wife asks. |