Funky Laws
The following laws are still on the books. Most are no longer enforced and
many contemporary lawmakers are not even aware of the laws' existence or
history. Some are state laws, some are local within the states. Check to
see if you have broken any laws.
Alabama
-
It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.
California
-
Community leaders passed an ordinance that makes it illegal for anyone to
try to stop a child from playfully jumping over puddles of water.
Connecticut
-
You can be stopped by the police for biking over 65 miles per hour.
-
You are not allowed to walk across a street on your hands.
Florida
-
Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon
owner.
-
A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or they
risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
-
If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be
paid just as it would for a vehicle.
-
It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
-
Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
Illinois
-
It is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, and other
domesticated animals kept as pets.
Indiana
-
Bathing is prohibited during the winter.
-
Citizens are not allowed to attend a movie house or theater nor ride in a
public streetcar within four hours after eating garlic.
Iowa
-
Kisses may last for as much as, but no more than, five minutes.
Kentucky
-
By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold
onto the ground."
-
It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.
Louisiana
-
It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water
pistol.
-
Biting someone with your natural teeth is "simple assault," while biting
someone with your false teeth is "aggravated assault."
Massachusetts
-
Mourners at a wake may not eat more than three sandwiches.
-
Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely
locked.
-
An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special
license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
-
Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi
during their shifts.
Nebraska
-
A parent can be arrested if her/his child cannot hold back a burp during
a church service.
New Mexico
-
Females are strictly forbidden to appear unshaven in public.
New York
-
A fine of $25 can be levied for flirting. This old law specifically prohibits
men from turning around on any city street and looking "at a woman in that
way." A second conviction for a crime of this magnitude calls for the violating
male to be forced to wear a "pair of horse-blinders" wherever and whenever
he goes outside for a stroll.
North Dakota
-
Beer and pretzels can't be served at the same time in any bar or restaurant.
Ohio
-
Women are prohibited from wearing patent leather shoes in public.
Oklahoma
-
Violators can be fined, arrested, or jailed for making ugly faces at a dog.
-
Females are forbidden from doing their own hair without being licensed by
the state.
-
Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups
of three or more on private property.
Pennsylvania
-
A special cleaning ordinance bans homemakers from hiding dirt and dust under
a rug in a dwelling.
-
No man may purchase alcohol without written consent from his wife.
Texas
-
A city ordinance states that a person cannot go barefoot without first obtaining
a special five-dollar permit.
-
It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.
Vermont
-
Lawmakers made it obligatory for everybody to take at least one bath each
week- - on Saturday night.
Washington
-
All lollipops are banned.
-
A law to reduce crime states: "It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal
intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as
he is entering the town.
West Virginia
-
No children may attend school with their breath smelling of "wild onions."
Back to the Supposedly True Stories section or the
Humor Index