When you are sad,
I will get you drunk and help you plot revenge against the scum sucking bastard who made you sad.
When you are scared,
I will laugh at you and tease you about it every chance I get.
When you are worried,
I will tell you how much worse it could be and to quit complaining.
When you are confused,
I will use little words to explain it to your dumb ass.
When you are sick.
I will hold your hair while you pay homage to the porcelain God.
When you fall
I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.
This is my oath.
I pledge till the end.
Why you may ask?
Because you're my friend.
Send this to ten of your closest friends and you will win the Lottery.
(Don't believe that last line about the lottery.)