Winter Olympics Drinking Game


The next time the Winter Olympic Games (or Olympic Winter Games, as the IOC prefers to call them) comes, here's a little competition that may help to make your viewing more pleasurable.

First, lay in a stock of your favorite beverage.

Then, turn on CBS and observe the following rules:

  1. Take one drink every time a CBS announcer invites you to "share a moment with the world."
  2. Take one drink every time snowboarding highlights are backed up by rock-and-roll guitar/heavy metal headbanger music.
  3. Take one drink every time a female athlete is described as "America's _____ing sweetheart." Take an extra drink if the athlete in question is "American's curling sweetheart."
  4. Clap your hands and take one drink every time reference is made to "the revolutionary new clap skate" being used in speed skating.
  5. Take one drink every time figure skating commentator Scott Hamilton shouts that a skater "NAILED!!" a jump.
  6. Take one drink every time you hear a hockey announcer shout, "He shoots...he scores!" Take two drinks if you're watching women's hockey and you hear, "She shoots...she scores!"
  7. Take one drink every time CBS promises to get "up close and personal" with an athlete.
  8. Take one drink every time a skater is presented with a bouquet of flowers.
  9. Take one drink every time America's quest for its first medal in luge is mentioned. Take an extra drink if America actually happens to win a medal in luge.
  10. Take one drink and sigh, "That's good, mon" every time reference is made to the Jamaican bobsled team.
  11. Take one drink every time the REAL Olympic theme (not that CBS fabrication) is heard.


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