On Friendship

1:20

Brak:: Zorak, are you my friend?
Zorak:: No.
Brak:: (plaintively) You're not?
Zorak:: (growling) Euuuuuhhh! Oh, all right, I'm your friend.
Brak:: Oh, that's good! It's good to have a friend. You know why? 'Cause they help you move and they give you a ride when your car is broken, and they lend you five dollars, and they help with your homework problems. None of my friends in school could help with my homework, 'cause they were almost as dumb as me.
Zorak:: I find THAT hard to believe.
Brak:: But I graduated anyway. You know why? Because of The Brak Rule. "Whensoever a student shall reach an age greater than the average age of the teachers in the school, that student shall henceforth be graduated"! That's the Brak Rule, it's named after me!
Zorak:: Well, that's quite an honor.
Brak:: I should say so.
Zorak:: Hey Brak, my good friend, willya loan me five dollars?
Brak:: I don't have five dollars. I don't have any money. I never have any money, EVER! But that's all right, you know why? 'Cause I have a friend by the name of Zorak.
Zorak:: Oh, brother.
Brak:: (whispering) I think I'm going to cry.