|| (Everyone shuffles in and sits
Bob: A web page. Already I know this can't be good.
Tom Servo: Nothing to worry about Bob ol' boy! Me and Crow look at
them all the time don't we Crow?
Crow: One word Bob ol' pal: Po--
Last updated: July 25, 1998
Tom Servo: 'Updated' means "The last
time I came in here and changed the date at the top of the page".
And what are the critics saying about ReHuCoHa?
Bob: "Two digits up! Way up! Way
way way up!"
Tom Servo: "Better than the first one!"
Mike: "I'd go see it again! It makes for a good nap time."
Crow: "There weren't enough nude pictures."
"Time to send warm fuzzy email to Jerry!" - Emidecimal, local virus
Tom Servo: Local virus...?
Crow: Yeesh! He gets e-mail from diseases!
"...one of the best and most funny things I've ever read" - Zen Zenith, ReBoot
Mike: (Zen) "And as just as soon
as I learn my grammar, I'll read some more."
"This species gets more insane every day" -Diablo, lord of terror.
(Everyone turns and looks at Bob)
Crow: Looks as sane as the day we met him.
Bob: I'm not human you doits!
(Tom pokes Bob)
Bob: Ow! Hey! What'd you do that for?
Tom Servo: Just checkin'!
Tom Servo: We'll tell you what that
means later. Really!
Bob: Hah. Hah hah. Pun Fun-E.
Mike: (Bob) "Now.. where's the beef?"
Tom Servo: Ohh, cold!
Bob: I never got any pay for appearing on this web page ya know.
Welcome to the REBOOT Humor Community Hall. Yes,
Tom Servo: Now go away.
that's the ReHuCoHa.
Crow: That's the ReHuCoHa,
this is just another page by some cow!
Mike: Go fig.
Now just try saying that 10 times fast.
Crow: Erm... well okay.. ReHuCoHa.
Tom Servo: ReHuCoHa! ReHuCoHa! ReHuCoHa!
Mike: ReHuCoHa! ReHuCoHa! ReHuCoHa!
Bob: ReHuCoHa! ReHuCoHa! ReHuCooKa! D'OH!
Heck, try saying it at all.
(By now all four of them are chanting
Mike: ReHuCoHa! ReHuCoHa! Hey! This is fun!
Tom Servo: ReHuCoHa! ReHuCoHa! ReHuCoHa! Yeah! The more I do it, the
more the throbbing in my head increases!
Bob: ReakHokeCokeNa! ReHuSmegNa! ReSnow.. oh I give up..
Crow: ReHuCoHa! ReHuCoHa! Heh heh! I sound like I'm worshipping the
devil and I LOVE IT!
This page is updated at least once every week.
Tom Servo: He changes the date at
the top, EVERY week? That IS pretty impressive.
If not, it means I don't have access to a computer, or I have technical
Mike: Meaning he decided to play
his guitar instead.
(Yes... that ought to cover almost everything)
Crow: Except for the emotional trauma
everyone suffers when his site isn't updated!
Tom Servo: (Sobbing) Heartless cow! He hasn't even updated WFS!
Mike: What? You guys have been here before?
Crow: Oh sure Mike! We love this page!
Mike: Why didn't you tell Pearl?!
Bob: Shh! It's more fun this way!
ReHuCoHa is graciously hosted by
Tom Servo: Which, in turn, is hosted
by The Discovery Channel.
Crow: Explore your self! Um. World!
Mike: (Putting a hand to his forehead) I can't cope.
Having a relative with a TLK page is nice...
Bob: It's also cheap!
Feel free to snag and use this crummy button.
Crow: WHAT? I link to ReHoCoHa and
all I get is this stupid ICON? You have got to be kidding me!
Bob: Yep, that's what it says.
Crow: Oh.. it says that?
(Servo takes the button)
Tom Servo: I'm gonna put it on the wall in my room.
Bob: Oh the fun we can have with this button!
Tom Servo: "We Need you Now! Send
us $100 and we WON'T destroy the Mainframe building."
Bob: Um. That'd be bad. I'd vanish.
Crow: Little cold there Servo..
Happy Birthday To Me...
Tom Servo: Ahem! Music?
(Music to the tune of 'Happy Birthday to you..' starts playing)
Tom Servo: Er. Thanks.
Crow: (Singing) Happy Birthday to you!
Bob: (Singing) To you the word 'pat' means poo!
Mike: (Singing) That's because you're a.. uh.. coooow!
Tom Servo: (Singing) And you look like one too! Whoo!
Yep, Wednesday July 29th is ol' JTC's birthday.
All: Happy birthday Jerry!
Crow: ..the cow.
Gifts, cards, cash donations, and all major credit cards accepted.
Crow: I bet even HE won't accept
Tom Servo: VISA! It's everywhere, you WANNA BE!
On another note, it'll have to be a mid-week update,
Mike: The date July 30th just
becase all I have to put up right now is a new fic, and
Bob: Well.. it sucks.
Mike: The ironic thing is, the fic he's talking about isn't even his.
it's not quite ready.
Crow: It doesn't yet have a digitized
Ah well, check back later.
Crow: Heh heh! He's on a course for
The ReHuCoHa is where the fluff is secondary.
Crow: .. and the Bill Clinton Jokes
come hard and strong!
It's just give you an informal place for Reboot fans to share their jokes
and stories with others.
Tom Servo: Sad thing is, the funniest
thing in the ReBoot universe is the episode Web World Wars
If you have any suggestions,
Crow: Bite me! Beef! It's what's
I would like this whole place to be a community effort.
Mike: (Jerry) "A community effort
you hear? A COMMUNITY EFFORT! Go now. Go. I must talk to my dog about my
plans to set the queen of England on fire eh?"
All original art, unless otherwise stated was kindly donated by Dot.
Mike: (Jerry) "Who helped us in this
COMMUNITY EFFORT! COMMUNITY! EFFORT! Don't make me get my knife out!"
Bob: Um. Yes Mike.
Here you go. Enter the ReHuCoHa.
Jerry: Hi guys!
Jerry: How you all doing today?
Jerry: You gonna enter the ReHoCoHa like I suggested? Because you
DO know I want this to be a CoMmUnItY eFfOrT don't you?
Jerry: Well thank you for visiting my page! I'll be going now. Remember,
send me stuff for this CoMmUnItY eFfOrT or I'll NOOGIE YOU
ALL! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! Yoink!
(Jer promptly vanishes in a puff of tuna)
Mike: (Huddling with Tom) I know Bob. I saw it too.
Tom Servo: (Sobbing) The cow! Make the cow leave me alone!
Mike: There there baby, it'll be alright.
Crow: (In shock) I will NEVER look at beef the same way again...
See what you can see, and what you can add...
Bob: I don't think I can add anything.
Insanity is one thing this place isn't lacking.
The Coolest Things About... (Top 10
Mike: Ya know, I don't think there
IS anything cool about Top 10 humor.
Lines They Should Have Said
Crow: (Dot) "I love you Meggy!"
Tom Servo: (Nibbles) "Son! Soooon! Save me son!"
Mike: (Hack) "Damn, I can't remember which finger is the can opener.."
Bob: "Hey Dot! Wanna tonsil wrestle?"
(Everyone blinks at Bob)
Bob: Uh. Heh. Nevermind.
Funny Fan Fiction
Crow: You mean like... *wink wink*
Mike: Crow! You're gonna get us into a lot of trouble!
Crow: Well, I thought it was funny.
The Grid Run
All I Need To Know, I Learned From...
Crow: Oh.. if the brackets weren't
there I could add SO much..
Mike: We know Crow. We KNOW.
Tom Servo: All I need to know, I learned from Joel.
Bob: Suddenly things come into focus.
Stupid Plot Twists
Bob: Oh you mean like, a web surfer
showing up at exactly the right moment?
Mike: Or Doctor F. turning into a star baby?
Crow: Or my voice changing every 7 years?
Tom Servo: Or a guy being trapped on a satellite with two bots, forced
to watch bad movies for the rest of his miserable life?
Mike: Don't remind me Tom.
Wise Fans Say...
Crow: "... screw ReBoot, let's all
go watch Star Trek instead!"
Roleplays Gone Stoopid
Tom Servo: On today's episode, Zelda's
IQ is dropped 2 notches, bringing it to 0!
Mike: Let's hope Pearl doesn't find
Check Out Mainframe
Tom Servo: He wants us to check it
out so we can laugh at it?
Bob: Alright! I've had quite enough of your ReBoot/Mainframe bashing
thank you very much.
Bob: Shouldn't that last link say
"I'm desperate for e-mail! SEND IT ME!"..?
Tom Servo: Only if the first one means "More stuff you probably won't
Decided to add a guestbook. What the heck, eh?
Crow: Yeah, what the heck. They're
only unoriginal and never used!
Tom Servo: Whoo hoo!
(Servo smacks a hand against the link and vanishes in a puff of smoke)
Bob: ACK! THE EVILNESS OF THE WEB! IT'S GOT SERVO!
Mike: Don't worry, he'll be back....
(Servo poofs back into place)
Crow: So how was it Servo?
Tom Servo: It was fun! I love filling out those messagy thingies!
But I got another button!
Bob: Oh ya? What kind?
Mike: Servo! Your room is messy enough, without more of those damn
Tom Servo: But it's fun! Wheee! Whoo! Ha ha!
Bob: Wow. What a beautiful picture
Crow: Nah, stick any picture in photoshop, mess around with the affects
a bit, and viola, you can whip that up in 5 seconds flat.
Tom Servo: Hey look everyone! It's
Tommy Lee Jones! Oh no wait.. just a cow. Nevermind..
Mike: Oh boy. How many '..in black' combinations can you have? I mean
for goodness sake, it's not funny any more! This is so over-used.
Crow: Don't expect it to stop Mike! We'll soon be seeing things like
Carrots in Black, Spice Girls In Black, Bill Gates in
Black and other such annoying things.
Bob: Yeah! The next thing you'll know we'll have Sprites in
Black! (Starts laughing) I mean, how stupid is that? Sprites in Black!
Oh please! How lame.. hehehehe.. heh.. heh... he.. heh.. eugh.
Mike: The ReHoCoHa, apparently, is
the only site that would accept the award so they made it's name part of
Bob: But you know, if Dot says it's good, it's gotta be good!
Tom Servo: Not THAT Dot, Bob.
Founder (and sole member) of the Cows In Black.
Crow: (Jerry) "Someone else join!
Please! It's lonely on my own..."
Thanks to CyberCat for the
Tom Servo: (Screaming) AHHHHHHH!
IT'S HER! SHE'S BACK! THE EVIL.. WOMAN.. WITH THE.. FIC.. THAT WAS BAD..
Mike: Servo! Servo! Calm down.. woah. It's okay. She's not writing
anything.. just.. making pictures.
Tom Servo: I'm scared Mike..
Bob: We all are kid. We all are.
Join the Blue Treble Clef Campaign!
Crow: Poor Jer. Little does he know,
Olga is actually some old hag who tricks people into putting her icon on
Bob: Hey, don't diss OGLA! It stands for On-Line Guitar Archive.
Mike: How do you know that?
Bob: They were a big help while I was still in Mainframe. Yeesh. Where
do you THINK I learnt to play the guitar?
Crow: Jerry "Stating the Blatently
Tom Servo: Mommy! I wanna go on the ring again! Can I mommy? Huh huh
huh? Can I! Whee! It's fun!
Mike: That's all folks! Let's ditch guys.
Crow: I'm just gonna stay behind for a moment if that's okay with
you Mike. I just wanna keep surfing for a moment.
Bob: Your loss, dude!
(They scramble out of the theater)
@.. 2.. 3.. 4.. 5.. 6..
Bob: Okay well. I will admit, that wasn't
Tom Servo: Hmmmn. Well, I just hope Megabyte is happy.
(Light starts flashing)
Mike: Speaking of which, old tin-butt is calling. (Hits the button)
And how're you sirs? Er.. sir?
Megabyte: Hello again Mike, Bob, Servo - I see you're still sane.
Too bad. Well I suppose I'll be signing off now.
Pearl: Not so fast chrome-dome, I want a word in here. I AM the one
driving after all. Mike, Bots, Bob, I'd like to to give me an HONEST opinion
of my new hood ornament.
Mike: Go ahead Pearl.
Bob: I didn't know she even had a hood to put an ornament on...
Pearl: Meet my friend, Jerry The Hood Ornament. He'll be sat on the
end of the Widowmaker from now on.
Megabyte: Urm.. Pearl? My dear. Jerry is a very good friend of mine
Pearl: Stuff it 'Byte boy, I run the show around here. Well, until
next time Nelson...
Tom Servo: Well..
(There's a moment of scilence)
Tom Servo: You have to admit he DOES make a good hood ornament.
Bob: Oh ya! Definitely!
(Suddenly a scream is heard from the theater)
(Crow stumbles onto the Bridge)
Crow: I just saw a picture of Joe Smith as Bob.. I am never going
Mike: Altogether I'd say this has been a pretty weird day.. and stuff.
(Light flashes again)
Bob: I just wish they'd go away..
Pearl: Well that didn't last long. I lost my hood ornament guys. Some
kitten ran up and placed cookies on it, which some how broke it free and
they.. ran off.. into a portal or.. something. Oh I dunno. But if you happen
to find it again, could you contact me? Because I WILL find that cow. Oh
I will. Yes.. yes.. yes I will. Don't you doubt it Mr. Jerry The Hood Ornament!
You WILL be mine. Oh yes. You WILL be mine. After all, you looked so cool
on my nice van.
Bobo: And when you get thirsty you just milk the sucker.
Pearl: Yes Bobo. Thank you for pointing that out. Well, tudils folks.