In the not-too-distant future --
Somewhere in Cyberspace. --
Guardian Bob and his new found pals
Are caught in an endless chase

Pursued by a woman who's name is Pearl
An evil gal who wants to rule the world
Teamed up with the virus Megabyte
Together they chase them - all throughout the day and night.

(We'll get yoooouuuuuu!)

"We'll send them cheesy stories
The worst we can find (La La La)
Written by the fans of ReBoot
Who have way too much free time (La La La)"

Now keep in mind the guys can't control
Where the stories begin or flow (La La La)
They'll try to keep their sanity
Despite the lame stories and some cheap cameo's

Robot Role Call!

Cambot (How z'it look?)
Gypsy (Makeup here!)
Tom Servo (More gum please.)
Crooooow! (It hurts!)

If you're wondering how this happened
'Cause this plot's all out of whack (La La La)
Just repeat to yourself, "It's just a crossover
I should really just relax!"

For...
Mystery ReBoot Theater 4000!

Written by CPFace(We're on the SOL. The bridge is empty for a moment, then Bob strolls in, eating a sandwich.)

Bob: (with his mouth full) Oh, hi everyone. (pauses to swallow) Welcome to the Satellite of Love. I was just. . .

Magic Voice: Warning. Incoming Game. Warning. Incoming Game.

(A panicked look crosses Bob's face. He screams, throws his sandwich in the air, and runs off. Crow and Servo pop up from behind the desk a second later, laughing hysterically.)

Servo: Oh man, did you see the look on his face?

(Crow imitates Bob panicking and they both laugh even harder.)

(Gypsy slides in a moment later. The other two bots calm down instantly.)

Gypsy: (sternly) Are you two bothering Bob again?

Crow: Yes! (Crow and Servo start cracking up again.)

Gypsy: (looking up) Magic Voice, you know you shouldn't be encouraging them like that.

Magic Voice: Sorry, Gypsy. They overrode all of my protocols.

(Gypsy sighs and shakes her head.)

Crow: (settling down) C'mon, Tom. Let's go get a sandwich.

Servo: Yeah, I think we've still got some of that Virginia ham left.

(Crow and Servo leave)

Gypsy: (addressing Cambot) Umm, hello! Well, just to bring you up to speed, the Mads towed us to this Class M planet a few days ago, and we don't know why. We've pretty much just been waiting for this week's transmission so they could explain. . .

(The red light goes off)

Gypsy: Oh! That was convenient! (shouting off-camera) Guys! Curious George and the Man in the Yellow Hat are calling!

(Cut to a shot of a waiting room of some sort. Megabyte's sitting in a chair, paging through a Reader's Digest; Bobo's crouched over a knee-high table, coloring in a coloring book; and Observer is sitting next to Megabyte, staring off into space. His brain looks slightly more pink than usual.)

Megabyte: (chuckling to himself) Ah, that Dave Barry is priceless. (looking up) Ah, hello. Time for your story again, I'm afraid. You know, there's nothing like a good crossover, and this week's experiment is nothing like a good crossover! (chuckles to himself) But enough about that. How are things with you?

(Cut to the SOL. Bob, Servo, and Crow have reported for duty.)

Servo: Well, not much. There was a new Simpsons the other day.

Bob: Yeah, and I beat everyone's bitmaps at this week's Monopoly match.

Crow: But, other than that, no big developements up here. Pretty much just biding our time, waiting to face your wrath.

(Cut back to the waiting room.)

Megabyte: Hmmm. . . I only count three. Where's the pink one?

(Cut to the SOL. The guys seem confused.)

Crow: Umm. . . pink one? Like. . . what do you mean?

Servo: Do you mean me? I'm really more of a fire engine red.

(Cut to the waiting room.)

Megabyte: (impatiently) No, I mean Nelson! Where is he?

(Cut back to the SOL.)

Crow: Oh, him! Yeah, he died.

Servo: Yep. Last Wednesday.

Bob: No, it was Monday; I remember Voyager was on.

Servo:Voyager's not on on Mondays.

Crow: Oh yeah, did you see Voyager? Man, that was a good one, with the giant space worm, and it. . .

(Cut back to the waiting room. Bobo and Megabyte are shocked.)

Megabyte: What do you mean, he's dead? What happened?

(Back to the SOL.)

Servo: (dismissively) I dunno. He must've died or something. (turns to Crow) Did you see that Voyager movie? Man, I couldn't believe it!

Crow: Yeah. Voyager's probably the only good show on UPN.

Bob: I don't know. That Dilbert show's pretty good.

Servo: I don't like it. I don't think Scott Adams's humor translates very well into a half-hour show.

Crow: Say, where's Mrs. Forrester?

(Back to the waiting room.)

Bobo: You know, personally, I could never understand why they axed that Platypus Man show. It's the kind of refreshing comedy that you don't see that much these days.

Megabyte: (gives Bobo an odd glance) As for Mrs. Forrester. . . well, that relates to what we're doing on this planet to begin with. We got pulled over when Pearl ran a red light, which is all your fault, by the way, since she had to do it to keep you from eluding us. At any rate, the officer found out she didn't have a license. So, we stopped here at the local DSV, and she's taking the spacecraft piloting test right now.

Bobo: (proudly) I did the brain transplant.

(Cut to the SOL. The crew is shocked.)

Bob: (incredulous) Brain transplant?

(Back to the waiting room.)

Megabyte: Well, she had no hope of passing the exams on her own. So, we decided to put Observer's brain in her skull for a few hours. You know; just until she passes her tests.

Bobo: It's been a while since my last brain surgery, but they say it's just like riding a bike. You gotta just get back on and keep trying no matter how many mistakes you make.

(Back to the SOL. The crew seems uneasy.)

Bob: So. . . is that her brain in the white guy's brain pan thing?

Servo: You know. . . I don't have much experience with this stuff, but maybe you should keep it somewhere a bit. . . safer?

(Back to the waiting room.)

Bobo: (holding up a piece of paper.) Nonsense! The Lawgiver gave me a very specific set of instructions right here. If there was something special I was supposed to do with her brain, I'm sure she would have --

Megabyte: Pardon me, Professor. . . what's that written on the other side?

Bobo: Other side? (turns the piece of paper over and looks at it. Panic grips him.) Oh dear. Oh my. (He degenerates into frightened monkey noises, grabs Pearl's brain, and runs off.)

(Megabyte puts his hands on his temples and sighs deeply.)

Megabyte: Well, your story today answers the age-old question of what would happen if a sprite traded places with the star of classic sci-fi show. It's Quantum ReBoot: Installation. Also submitted for your approval, a short horror piece by the same author. Trust me; this will hurt you a lot more than it hurts me.

(Cut to the SOL.)

Bob: Does Gypsy have a pilot's license?

(They ponder this a moment before the lights and sirens go off.)

All: We've got movie sign!


Click here to enter the theater