(Bob and the bots walk into the theater.)
Bob: Kind of
a weird day.
Servo: I'll
say.
Chapter 2
Crow: Electric Boogaloo!
Mainframe
Outskirts
of the Principal Office
Sam looked at lonely for the Mainframe'ssky and he murmured for God, Fate or Time:
Servo: You know, "To Whom it May Concern".
"You already placed me in strangesituations, and even bizarre situations,
Bob: Weird situations, even!
of the whole kind, butof this time You overcame yourself!"
After he said that,
Servo: God, Fate, and Time got mad and gave him a wedgie.
Sam went back to thePrincipal Office trying imagine a way of entering there.
Crow: (Sam) Three trained monkeys, a crowbar, some bubblegum. . . it just might work!
"Hey, Enzo!", a voice behind himcalled.
Sam turned himself, and he saw a femalesprite of green skin, short black hair and blue eyes. She shouldhave between 20 and 25 years.
Bob: But instead, she was between 20 and 25 facelifts.
"What are you processing?", theyoung woman asked.
"Oh boy!", Sam thought.
Crow: (Sam)
A lady talked to me!
Servo: (ominously) What is Sam processing? We may never know.
Project Quantum
Leap
Control
Room
"But... but that is impossible!",Gooshie exclaimed.
Bob: (Gooshie) There's got to be a way I can get my name changed!
Ziggy, the parallel-hybrid supercomputerthat controlled the project, spoke with arrogance:
Servo: (HAL) I've decided to replace you, Dave.
"This is not impossible, since thefacts prove that is possible."
"Do you mean that Sam Leaped in acomputer program?!", Donna Eleese-Beckett asked, shocked.
Crow: No, it's
just a kids' TV show.
Bob: Just the
best kids' TV show on the face of the planet, you
mean.
Crow: In order
to not get flamed by all of our wonderful readers,
yes.
"In a computer sprite.", Alcorrected, while he tried to light his cigar.
Servo: (Al) Rubbing sticks together just isn't as convenient as a lighter.
"Does that mean that there are peopleinside of the computers!?", Tina asked of this time. "Idon't believe!"
Crow: It's true! I read it on the Internet!
"Verbena is in the Waiting Roominterviewing the boy, but, definitively, Sam is inside of acomputer!"
Bob: Good point, whoever you are.
Ziggy interrupted again.
"Admiral, Dr. Beeks has justtransmitted data about the host family.
Servo: Hey, great! They got the data about the host family! Now they can. . . uh. . .
I believe to be a goodidea, due to the situation of this leap, to inform Dr. Beckettregarding that."
Crow: Yeah, that's a great idea, what with how. . . umm. . . the host family and everything. . .
Al will give an answer nothing educated toZiggy, but he thought better,
Bob: (Al) I'd better not give an answer nothing educated to Ziggy, seeing as how I don't know what it means.
and he went
to the Imaging Chamber.
Mainframe
Outskirts
of the Principal Office
"Hi, Sis!", Sam answered. Theword left his mouth naturally. "Thank you,telepathy!",he thought. "I'm fine. And you?"
Servo: The small talk explodes across the screen!
"Me too. I am going to the PrincipalOffice. Phong called me for a reunion.", she answered.
Sam released the air, of relief.
All: Ewww!
On thismoment, the Imaging Chamber door opened up.
"Hey, Sam! That is Enzo'ssister!", Al informed, consulting the handlink. Her name isDot Matrix.
Crow: (Al) She's wanted for kidnapping in thirteen states.
She seems to be a kind of workaholic entrepreneur,someone very important here, in Mainframe. In fact, the name ofthis city is Mainframe!"
Sam (that thought "now that he tellsme that she is "my" sister") asked Dot:
"About what the meeting is?"
Bob: A Joshua Falken motiff: plots that revolve around meetings.
"It looks that somebody or somethingelevated the energy level of Mainframe.
Servo: (Dot) They're flooding the market with counterfeit energy!
We will try to discoverwhat is making that."
"Sam, ask for her to take you to thePrincipal Office!
Crow: (Al) And ask her to buy you a hot dog!
According to Enzo, there, in a place calledRead-Only Room, they are all the information regarding this city,er... I want to say, system."
Bob: Good thing Mainframe has a fully operational Department of Back Story.
Sam asked Dot if he could go with her."I need to go to the Read-Only Room, to do a research forthe school", he justified.
A little surprise, she agreed.
Servo: (Dot) It's kinda odd that Enzo would have to go to the top-level archives of the entire system to do research for a school project, but, okay.
"She reminds me a girl that I knew inLas Vegas, Sam. She had...", Al began.
Crow: (Al) Green skin and a mono-breast.
Sam only glancing heavenward.
They entered
in the Principal Office.
Project Quantum
Leap
Waiting
Room
Dr. Verbena Beeks was completely surprised.She was not speaking with a human being,
Bob: She was
calling Microsoft's Tech Support line.
Servo: Yes,
the Microsoft jokes never get old, do they?
like her, but with asprite, a digital being! She didn't imagine that that waspossible: an entire civilization existed inside of a simple HD!
Crow: See, this is the stuff they should be teaching in those computer science courses, not all that dumb logic gate stuff.
She felt more or less as the guy of the movie Tron.
But even so, she calmly talked with EnzoMatrix.
Servo: Seeing as how she talked with computers every day, for crying out loud.
"Then, you mean that there are twovirus in Mainframe. One called Hexidecimal, totally chaotic, andanother called Megabyte, thirsty of power, and always trying toconquer Mainframe and reach the Supercomputer."
Bob: I'm somewhat
disappointed that the entire plot of my show can be summed up in two
sentences.
Crow: Hey,
join the club.
She imaginedthat the Supercomputer should be a Cray-2 or a CM-5.
Servo: She imagined the Supercomputer all dressed up in its overalls and prancing around a green field on a warm spring day.
"Yes, but he won't get because Bobalways defeats him."
"Who is Bob?"
Bob: (Enzo) The guy who defeats him; are you listening to me at all?
"He is the Guardian of Mainframe. Hedefends us of the viruses and of the User".
Verbena was confused.
Crow: Oh, come
on. That was an unusually well-formed sentence, for this
guy.
Servo: I'm
starting to get used to it already.
How like this"defend them of the User?"
Enzo explained
the that wanted to say andthe Verbena's spine froze.
Bob: Then it just gets really dirty, so let's skip ahead.
Mainframe
Read-Only
Room
Sam was seeking in the various windows ofthe name of Mainframe's User and the registration number of thecomputer.
Crow: So, his purpose in this leap is to do some light research?
Starting from that, they could discover the that hadhappened in this system that Sam should mend.
Servo: 'Cause, you know, Ziggy's only good at figuring out the names of people inside computers.
He had known more two sprites, that at thistime were talking with Dot.
"The name of Deep Blue here isBob.",
Crow: (to
Bob) Wow! You're that supercomputer that beat that one chess master
guy?
Bob: Umm. .
. .yeah.
Al said, pointing for the sprite of blue skin, browneyes and silicon-colored hair. "According to the boy, himand Dot they are between the friendship and the courtship.
Servo: (Al) They're in the warship.
He isa... Guardian?! His protocol is "to mend and defend".
"He is a kind of sentinel.", Samthought, observing the blue uniform and the icon. It wasdifferent: the same drawing, but instead of black and white, itwas yellow and black.
Crow: I guess I was wrong. Sam's mission is obviously to meticulously go over every detail of ReBoot's back story.
The another had, more or less, the half ofthe height of Dot and Bob. He was Phong, executive secretary ofCommand.Com. His icon was a Yin and Yang symbol. He reminded Saman old and wise Chinese.
Sam clicked, concentrated, in the windows.Suddenly, he smiled. He had found what sought.
Servo: Oh man. . . you know, if little kids like Enzo can use the read-only room, they should really put some restrictions on those pictures.
"And then, Sam?"
After recovering of his heart attack,
Bob: You know, six or seven months later.
Samgreeted Al and he said:
"I discovered, Al!
Crow: (Sam) I discovered Al! I hereby claim Al in the name of Spain!
The user's name isGregory Carter, and the registration code of the computer is3487-TYU-578FG/21."
"O.K. I will give those data toZiggy." Al smiled. "You can be calm, Sam. We willdiscover which is your mission." And he disappeared.
Servo: No one shall be admitted during the gripping and climactic data exchange scene!
Sam continued in the Read-Only Room. Afterall, if he had to execute a mission here, he should know the citywell for not doing nonsense.
Bob: Wow! We
get to see him doing more research!
Crow: Yeah!
That's great! I was afraid the research would stop once he found the User's
name, but he's going to keep on doing research!
Servo: I'm
recording all of the research scenes in my extended memory so I can play
them back later.
Crow: Wow!
Can you give me a copy?
Servo:
Sure!
Mainframe
Meeting
room
Phong, Dot and Bob discussed regarding theincrease of the energy levels.
Bob: (Phong) As you know, the energy levels have increased. That's about all we know. Good meeting; same time next minute?
"It is very strange, my child, butthis increase of energy is not making anything.
Servo: (Phong) The plot still refuses to advance itself. Anyone think we should do something?
The energy isdispersed for such an extensive field, that cannot do nothingbad."
Bob spoke:
"This energy is in a very strangeexcited state.
Crow: (Bob) It's growing up, starting to notice girls. . .
This state seems with one that I heard inSupercomputer ".
"Which?", Dot and Phong asked,surprised.
"I don't know exactly.",Bobinformed. "It seems with a called Quantum Leaping".
(Everyone starts laughing)
Bob: Yep. Really
secret government program all right.
Servo: Wait
a minute! What if it turns out that Ziggy is the
Supercomputer?
(Everyone considers this)
Crow: I hate this story.
Bob will explain more, but he wasinterrupted by AndrAIa, that had arrived.
"Do you know where the Guardianis?", she asked.
Bob: I'm right there; is she blind?
Bob knew who is the "guardian"that she was referring.
Servo: Turbo. He owed her some money.
"Enzo is in the Read-Only Room.",he answered.
AndrAIa thanked and she went in directionto the room.
Crow: Tearing down every wall in her way.
Bob gave a funny glance for Dot and heasked: "Didn't he yet say to her that him isn't aguardian?"
Dot
shrugged.
Bob: Ah, the bright promise of yet another bland, pointless scene.
Project Quantum
Leap
Control
Room
Al has just transmitted to Ziggy theinformation that Sam had given, when he saw Verbena to come inhis direction. She took a breath.
Servo: Then she breathed out. As she was doing this, her heart beat, blood carried nutrients to her cells, her intestines absorbed nutrients from the food moving through her bowels. . .
"Al, there is something that Sam needsto know about Mainframe."
Crow: (Verbena) It's a computer.
She told the that Enzo had told regardingthe Games that the User executed in Mainframe. Al was of openmouth by an instant, later
Bob: At camp. . .
he was recomposed and he asked withserious air:
"Are you sure,'Bena?"
Servo: (Verbena) No, just kidding! Ha! You'll believe anything, won't you?
She confirmed.
At this time, Ziggy interrupted, as ofhabit. But of this time, her voice had an urgency tone.
"Admiral, we determined the Dr.Beckett's mission.
Crow: (Ziggy) He has to get the plot going before the crossover flatlines!
I would advise
you so that it went as soon aspossible to the Imaging
Chamber."
Mainframe
Read-Only
Room
Sam was astonished with the history ofMainframe. He had discovered regarding the Twin City and the Dotand Enzo's parents.
Bob: Yes, that's the entire history of Mainframe.
On that moment, the door of the room openedup. A girl entered, dressed with if she has just left of a pool.She seemed a little with a mermaid.
Servo: Is there
anything I could say here that would not get us sued by
Disney?
Bob: Hmm. .
. I don't think so.
But Sam only would noticethis later
Crow: (Josh) I don't even know why I brought it up. Which one of these is the backspace key? All well; I'll just leave it in. Who'll care?
because when AndrAIa saw Sam, her eyes were stared andshe was placed in attack position.
"Who are you?!",the girldemanded.
All: (singing) Who who! Who who!
"Hey! It's me! Enzo, AndrAIa!",Sam said with a weak smile.
"NO WAY!!! YOU AREN'T ENZO!!!"
Servo: Ooo. . . Someone forgot to have her Flinstone's chewable anti-psychotic this morning.
Suddenly, AndrAIa had jumped on top of him
Crow: Saaaaaay. . .
and she was ready tonail the paralyser fingernails into him.
"Oh Boy!"
Bob: He's taking the whole "about to die" thing pretty well.
Chapter 3
Project Quantum
Leap
Control
Room
Ziggy told to Al and Verbena which could bethe Sam's mission.
"My God!", Al murmured indisbelief. "Are you sure, Ziggy?", did he demand.
(Servo sighs deeply.)
Crow: Take out all the lines where someone doubts someone else, and you have no dialogue at all in this story.
All the Ziggy's ego showed.
"Admiral, with a million gigabytecapacity I'm quite capable of rubbing my tummy,
Bob: (Ziggy) If I had one.
patting my head,
Bob: (Ziggy) If I had one.
and doing a trillion floating point operations at once!
Bob: (Ziggy)
If I had one.
Servo: Uh,
no, that doesn't quite work.
Bob: Oh, sorry.
. .
Theprobabilities are of 99,3! Of course I am sure!"
Verbena closed the eyes, while Al had firein the eyes.
Crow: And Gooshie had Bettie Davis's eyes.
He was ready to pull up the blue ball, that wasZiggy's CPU, of the roof.
Bob: (Al) I'll teach you to figure out what Sam's mission is!
Verbena said, trying to calm the courages:
"Al, is better you go speak withSam."
He agreed.
Servo: (Al)
Destroying our central supercomputer can wait until after I advance the
plot.
Mainframe
Room
Read-Only
"What did you make with Enzo?!"
Crow: (AndrAIa) Did you make him into a couch? You've got to stop doing that to people!
,did AndrAIa demand, while she threatened Sam with the paralyserfingernails.
"Nothing!",Sam cried, dividedbetween if he was surprised by her agility or for the fact thatshe know that he wasn't Enzo Matrix.
Crow: Or the fact that he was strangely enjoying this.
He held her arms, impedingthat she nailed the fingernails in his neck. She was younger thanhe but the determination more than compensated that.
Bob: I saw a two-year-old kill a guy in his thirties. Real determination there.
"Then where he is?!"
"In the future!", he said hopingher believe in the truth.
"Do you think that I am basic?!"
Servo: (AndrAIa) I'm acidic all the way!
"But it is the truth!!" Sam triedto think in something, when he saw a mirror. "If you don'tbelieve in me, LOOK AT!"
When she looked at the mirror image,
Crow: Sam shouted, "Sucker!" and ran away.
sheopened the mouth of astonishment. She was holding a guy withbrown eyes and brown hair, but in the reflection she was holdingEnzo!
Bob: (AndrAIa) He's a vampire! No, wait, they don't cast reflections at all.
"But... how?", did she murmur.
Sam took advantage of her
All: (offended) Heeeey!!!!!
distraction
All: Oh.
andhe pushed her of top of him. He rose and he went to the otherside of the table. AndrAIa had already recovered of the shock andshe got ready to attack Sam.
Crow: (AndrAIa) Okay, put it in drive, check the mirrors, check the blind spot. . .
On that moment, the Imaging Chamber dooropened up.
Al came running for the blue door.
"Sam, we know now... WHAT ISHAPPEN?!", did he ask when he noticed the situation.
Servo: (Al) How many times do I have to tell you kids not to fight? Now go to your rooms!
"She can see me, Al! As myself!"
AndrAIa saw a guy (with a terrible tastefor clothes) come from a kind of blue rectangular portal. Sheattacked him.
Bob: Y'know, I'm starting to wonder just how wise it was to let this wild, deadly Game Sprite live among us.
Her arm had crossed the man!
"Where is Enzo?" AndrAIa,although surprised, she asked for the hologram, with adetermination shine in the eyes that it surprised Al.
Crow: (Al, annoyed) I don't know! Shut up!
"Well, Little Mermaid...", hebegan.
Little Mermaid?! That hurted, Al!, Samthought,
Servo: (Leslie Nielson) Maybe not as much as jumping on a bicycle with a missing seat, but it hurted, Al.
closing the eyes. AndrAIa didn't also like to havecalled like this, making faces.
Bob: Ironically, she gave him fishy lips.
Al noticed that, but hecontinued: "well... believe or not, Enzo is safe... in thefuture!"
Crow: (Al) But in the present. . . Man, I wouldn't want to be in his shoes.
"How can he be in the future?",did AndrAIa ask incredulous.
"Well, that is with me.", Samsaid. "I am a time traveler, and I travel changing placeswith a person of the past."
Servo: Yes, tell the dangerously excitable Game Sprite that you stole her best friend's body. I'm sure she'll understand.
AndrAIa thought that history was very weird,
Bob: And that Algebra was boring.
but she was surprised when her game sprite instinct told to herthat could believe in them!
Crow: Of course, it also told her to believe in extra-terrestrial voodoo monkeys, so. . .
She took a breath for the nextquestion.
"And why do you travel in the time?And how do you resemble Enzo in the mirror?"
Servo: And what about Scarecrow's brain, and the Tin Man's heart?
She didn'tstill understand that.
"I resemble Enzo, why when I Leap intosomebody I catch the person's "aura", and the personcatch with my "aura", in the Waiting Room.",
Bob: We will not rest until every single ReBoot character knows the premise of Quantum Leap!
Samexplained, while Al punches the handlink. "And I travel inthe time because... well...
Crow: (Sam) I don't get enough fiber.
because I am lost in the Time and Iam trying to return home. And it seems that some unknown forceguides me "to put right what went wrong", to me canLeap home."
"And why did you leap into Enzo?"
Servo: (Sam) Because I've already leaped into Duncan MacLeod, Doctor Who, and Jean-Luc Picard.
"Because some very wrong thing willhappen in Mainframe, and I have to put right."
"What will happen?", did she askconcerned. In some way she knew that Sam was telling the truth.
Bob: In some strange, unrealistic, convenient way.
"I answer that!" Al was turnedfor Sam. "Sam, Ziggy discovered which is your mission. And Ithink we are in big trouble - BIG."
Crow:
(horrified) No! Not Big! Not a Tom Hanks movie! Anything
but that!
Project Quantum
Leap
Control
Room
"Sam already Leaped into singers, testpilots,
Servo: Gummy bears, transvestites. . .
candidates to the miss prize, sought killers, soldiers,
Bob: Lions and tigers and bears. . .
con men, mentally-absent people,
Crow: (singing) And a partridge in a pear treeeee!
and even in a chimpanzee... butof this time..." Donna Eleese shook the head.
Gooshie agreed:
Servo: (Gooshie) I agree.
"God should be playing dices! Imean... which is the importance of a computer for theworld?!"
Bob: (Gooshie)
Who cares about all the hard-working sprites and binomes who tirelessly crunch
numbers for me because my enfeebled mind can't? They can all go to
hell.
Crow: A little
bitter, Bob?
Bob: Well.
. .
The comment was not very happy.
"Dr. Conelf, don't you considerimportant MY WORK?!?", did Ziggy ask, clearly offended.
Servo: (Gooshie) Why. . .no! I mean, uh. . . some of my best friends are computers!
Verbena left Donna and Gooshie trying calmdown the egotistical supercomputer. She had to go to the WaitingRoom, speak with Enzo.
Crow: And now, back to our story.
She entered in the room and she saw Enzobored.
Bob: Who's
Enzobored?
Servo: Oh,
that's the evolved form of Enzo, after you use a thunder stone on
him.
"How are you, Enzo?"
"All right, except that I don't haveanything to do.", the sprite answered.
Crow: (Verbena) Well, why don't you play a computer game?. . . D'oh! Sorry, I forgot. . . sorry. . .
"Well, perhaps I can bring some CDsfor you listen." Verbena didn't want him know that he was inthe Userworld.
Bob: Travelling through time? Fine. . . Secret government project? Okay. . . Tell him about the Userworld? Nah. Might be too hard to handle.
She already knew that the Mainframe inhabitants(and probably everybody that "lived" in the Net)thought that they - the users - were a kind of God,
Crow: That you could use as a throwpillow.
malicious andthat liked to play with their fates -- exactly as God, Fate orTime with the Sam. If he knew that was talking with a User...
Servo: It would help him to better understand his place in the universe and possibly bring some meaning into his brief, pointless cyber-existance. Better not risk it.
Enzo thanked and she left.
He had not told that was feeling an weirdthing in the stomach.
Bob: (Enzo) Maybe I shouldn't have eaten the whole cat.
The sensation was as if his body wascharging batteries for a journey.
Crow: But.
. . it's Sam's body, right?
Mainframe
Room
Read-Only
"Which is, Al?" Sam asked.
Servo: Oh, he's the holographic one. You know, the one with the handlink who has disgusting ideas about women.
The observer took a breath.
Crow: (Observer)
You see, you are to us as an ameboa is to you.
Bob: You do
him a little too well, Crow.
"According to Ziggy, Greg Carter triedinstall in your computer, Mainframe, a new graphic program. Theproblem was
Servo: (Al) He tried installing it with a sledge hammer.
that that program had an incompatibility flaw withthe operating system of this city. The installation provoked asystem crash, that disabled completally the HD, not allowing therestoration of the city. He threw the HD away."
Crow: Hey, the plot's here! It's two chapters late, so we get it for free!
"Al, you mean that... was the wholecity destroyed?"
"Yes."
Bob: So, Greg's
system crashes, and it takes the rest of the city with
it?
Servo: No,
he means Mainframe!
Bob: Oh. .
.
"Enzo, Dot, Bob, AndrAIa..."
Crow: Phong, Cecil, and Doc.
"Deleted without backup."
Sam leaned on in the wall. The legs hadlost the firmness suddenly.
Bob: Well, you gotta expect that when you don't exercise regularly and if you keep hitting the hohos.
"Oh, boy!
Crow: (Sam) They're gonna die! Neat!
My God, I have to savethe whole city! And the incredible, is that the city was insideof a HD!
Servo: Yes, for those of you just tuning in.
The User will destroy Mainframe, and he not even wouldknow about that! And I don't have the minimum idea of as to avoidthat!", he thought.
Bob: Wouldn't it have been more convenient all around if he'd just leapt into the User?
Part of AndrAIa's neural interface feltthat was something in the talk that she had not noticed, but theother part was scared with what it would happen.
Crow: Umm. . . I'd be like that too, if I knew what it was.
"Can't we make anything tostop?", did she ask.
"It's for that that I am here.",Sam answered. "But I don't know how."
Servo: A simple "yes" or "no", Sam.
"Don't worry, Sam! Ziggy is runningscenarios after scenarios, to discover as preventing that ".
"Meanwhile, I will be here, trying todiscover some thing that can help."
Bob: Wow, what
with the plot picking up, I was afraid they were going to stop the research
scenes.
Crow: I wish
it would never end!
Al nodded and he disappeared for ImagingChamber door.
Sam asked AndrAIa:
"Do you help me?"
Servo: (Sam) I can't remember.
She look directly to him, for a moment.
"Sure."
And both began to open windows and morewindows.
Bob: Wow! They're
researching together now!
All:
(chanting) RE-SEARCH! RE-SEARCH! RE-SEARCH! RE-SEARCH!
RE-SEARCH!
Project Quantum
Leap
Waiting
Room
("Awwwwwws".)
Crow: They were just starting to research, too!
Enzo was listening "Johnny B. Goode"
Servo: <snort> Yeah. The fifties will live forever.
(he thought the music was a little strange, but he liked),when suddenly he felt a lot of pins in his body.
Bob: Oh geez. . . I told him not to run with those!
"Doctor!", he called her.
Dr. Verbena Beeks ran to Enzo.
Crow: (Verbena, muttering) Every five minutes. . . what's the little brat want this time?
"What did happen?"
"I don't know. I am... feelingsomething...",
Servo: (Verbena) Yeah, yeah, it's all part of growing up. Can I go back to the crisis now?
the sprite told twisting.
Verbena called the medical staff, when EnzoMatrix was wrapped up by the blue light of Quantum Leaping.
Servo: Sam completed his mission and Enzo returned to his own body. Let's get out of here.
(The guys get up and leave.)
(We're back in the SOL bridge. Crow is standing in front of the desk expectantly. Bob passes by, reading a magazine.)
Crow: Hi Bob.
Bob: (absently) Hi Tom.
Crow: Uh, actually, I'm Crow.
Bob: (looking directly at Crow) Oh no. You're not pulling that one on me again. You're Tom Servo, the one with the bubble gum machine head and the slinky arms that don't work and. . .
Crow: No, no, I mean I actually am Crow. Look at Cambot's monitor over there.
(Bob looks at Cambot's off-screen monitor and makes a startled sound.)
Bob: Tom! I mean, Crow! You're. . . How come you. . . What's going on?
Crow: Well, ha ha, I got a little excited about today's story and decided to fire up our time machine and use it to quantum leap myself. You know, put right what once went wrong, that whole deal.
Bob: Huh. Okay. . .
Crow: And so, my aura, my soul, my very being was sent hurtling back through the ages, seeking a horrible injustice to amend, never knowing which leap would be the leap home.
Bob: And. . . you leaped into Tom.
Crow: Yeah. I accidentally had it set to five minutes before I started.
Bob: Yeah. Shoulda checked that. So, what are you supposed to be doing here in the past?
Crow: I don't know yet. I was just waiting for my holographic advisor to appear and tell me my mission.
(The door opens and Al steps through.)
Al: Hey Crow. Sorry I'm late. Anyway, here's the deal. You're Tom Servo, one of the robots serving aboard the Satellite of Love. The year is 2527. That guy (points to Bob) is. . . (he slaps the handlink) a manifestation of some sort of computer program. Weird. His name's Bob.
Crow: Huh. (turns to Bob) Nice to meet you.
Bob: Pleasure's all mine.
Crow: (to Al) So, what's the deal? What am I supposed to do in this leap?
Al: Well, one of the other robots on the ship, Crow, is about to smear your prized underwear collection with a variety of different condiments, and you have to make sure he doesn't.
Crow: Can do! (Crow ducks down below the desk.)
Bob: Kind of a weird day.
Al: I'll say.
(Lights and sirens go off.)
Bob: We've got MOVIE SIGN!!!
