(The guys waltz in and find their seats.)
Bob: I've never seen Megabyte like that before...
A Season 4 Fic!!!
Tom: Like millions before
Crow: Why can't fans write something original? Like a season 12 fic.
Mike: Yeah. Where Bob has finally given up on trying to fix his car, and Matrix is watching over his eighteen kids while AndrAIa is on a cruise.
Issa: Reboot the best cartoon ever!
Bob: You bet it is!
Well, maybe not but is it a pretty good cartoon.
So since Mainframe inc.
Bob: That's Ent. Inc.
is too cheep
All: (making like bird noises)
to make a season 4, I've made REBOOT SEASON 4 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tom: I think his "!" key is sticky...
Mike: After math is English.
Bob: MIKE !!!!!!!
Mike: Oh no! I think he found out that I broke his new bike. I'm in deep trouble.
Bob: (stands up)
So it was you !
Mike: Hey...woah there.....
Bob: So there you are, you peace of bad data!
Tom: I should have thrown you out weeks ago before you started growing mold.
I should delete you right now Glitch ( Oh, I forgot to tell you Bob got a new key-tool )
Bob: Oh suuure. Like
that's believeable! There's only one Glitch!
Mike: Easy Bob. Calm down. It's early yet.
Mike: Bob, Please, I'm
sorry. Look behind you! Megabyte !!!
Bob: Megabyte???? Where ???????
Mike: Hahahahaha! Got you! (runs away)
Crow: HA! He fell for it!
The oldest trick in the book and he fell for it? Did you see that Bob?
Crow: Uh...never mind
Bob: I've never seen Mike run so fast before.
Tom: It must be those turbo charged sneakers.
Ah well, better go see Dot.
Crow: (Bob) That new outfit
that she got from the Super Computer came and boy, is it nice! It shows
Matrix: Oh my... Dot, look. It's mike the TV. He sure is in a hurry.
Bob: He's trying to catch
up with his food that he just bought at Dot's. I tried that once, it's really
hard. I bought it and then a nano later...
Tom: Shut up.
Dot: Maybe he saw someone doing a intervue.
Tom: That's French for "Interview".
Oh there's bob !!!
Crow: Bob is no longer important. His name must be in lower case from now on.
Bob: ah look at him go?
Mike: Well, we certainly don't know.
Tom: So, Matrix is an owl
Crow: Maybe it'll make him smarter.
Bob: Mike the TV. He broke my new bike. I tried too delete him and he got away.
Tom: Tooo many ooo's
Crow: (Dot) It's fun when
I'm insane hahahahahahahahaha.
Mike: I didn't know that Dot could laugh like that.
Bob: Neither did I.
Bob: Yeah, yeah, laugh it up.
Bob: Could one laugh it
Mike: Let it go Bob.
So what's processing?
Mike: (Bob) Oh that
reminds me. (Puts Mike the TV into a food processor)
Crow: Uh. . . Mike? How did you do that?
Mike: The usual way.
Crow: Matrix isn't thinking? So what's new?
Bob: Okaaay. Where is AndrAIa and Mouse and Enzo? Well, little Enzo.
Crow: (Dot) Well.... ya
Mike: Crow... please don't go there...
Dot: They're at the Principal Office. They're trying too find a way too too well too so there can only be one enzo
(All of them look at the sentence curiously)
Tom: What was
Mike: ...I...don't know
Crow: Enzo's wearing a tutu?
(They all read it again)
Tom: Nope. Still nothing.
Matrix: You can't say it Dot, can you ???
Tom, Crow & Mike: Aahh! You said the word!
Mike: He said it. Aahh! I said it! Ah! I said it again.
We are trying too kill small Enzo.
Mike: Well, he's
Tom: There's that extra o again.
Bob: Matrix, no please, stop it. Be careful.
Crow: (Bob) You don't want to think too hard and short circuit your eye.
If we 'kill him', you go with him, so we have too find a way too delete little Enzo without deleting you.
Crow: Why would you want
to do that?
Tom: (flinching) Is his o on his keyboard sticky or something?
Matrix: Oh yeah, sorry.
Tom: (Matrix) I'm really
sorry that I've got slow clock speed...in everything I do. Especially
Bob: Would you stop picking on Matrix? Even though... he deserves it in this story.
Computer: Warning incoming game. Warning incoming game.BOOM!!!!!!!
Crow: Finally! Someone decided to shoot that idiotic recording!
Bob: What in the Net was that
(then out of nowhere a vid window pops up)
Tom: Nowhere... Never been
there. Oh wait...isn't that where we are now?
Mike: Hey, you're right!
Phong: Bob, you better come here and fast!
Mike: (Phong) The popcorn is almost ready! We're starting the movie in five minutes...
( at the principal office )
Mike: (Phong) Bob, you've
been a bad Guardian, so I'm giving you one hour detention for two
Bob: Mike, you do realize how long that is, don't you?
Mike: Yeah, what's your point?
Dot: Phong, what's wrong?
Tom: (Phong) I haven't been able to sleep since they stopped making new episodes of Seinfeld.
Phong: Dot, you know the game that came a few nano's ago?
Mike: (Dot) No I didn't. I had my fingers in my ears while humming 'You're Alphanumeric!'
Well, that was not a game.
Bob: Well, What in the
Net WAS IT? It said 'Incoming Game!" of all things!
Tom: (gets out a roll of duct tape) Do I have to use this?
Bob: ...I'm fine...I'm calm. Breathe in....
My sensors found some thing strange...
Mike: ...in Bob's
Bob: How did you kn... never mind.
some thing not from here.
Tom: From a galaxy far, far away...
Bob: A virus !!!!
Crow: It's from Britian. It's called Mad Chicken Disease!
Phong: No, it is not a virus. It's a sprite,
Mike: I prefer Coca-cola myself.
but not from around here.
Tom: From a galaxy far, far away...
Dot: You mean not from Mainframe ?
Tom: Well that would be something "not from here" now, wouldn't it?
Phong: No, it is not from
the Net or the Web.
AndrAIa: Oh hi guys, what's procesing?
Mike: (Bob) Mike the TV. He should be done now.
Crow: Why does everyone even ask? He's never thinking of anything!
There something here in Mainframe, but no one knows what it is.
Mike: (Matrix) Oh yeah. That's nothing to be worried about. There might be a huge energy sucking sprite running rampant around Mainframe, but that's nothing.
Phong: Oh no! There's 2 of them!
Crow: See? That's what happens when you leave sprites unattended; they multiply.
Bob: This is
Dot: Very bad
Crow: What's the matter
Bob? Dot has to finish your sentences for you? And your over used one at
Bob: (glares at Crow)
Matrix: I say lets check it out!
Crow: (Matrix) We gotta get in on that action.
Bob: Ok, lets check it out, but only Matrix and I.
Crow: (Bob) It'll be more fun that way.
Dot & Mouse: But...!!!!!!
Mike: Crow, if you touch
that one, I swear I'll...
Crow: (sulking) ...kill joy.
Bob: No buts!
Mike: (Bob) This is a children's show. Only bitmaps allowed.
We are going and you are not going.
Tom: Me Tarzan. You Jane!
Ok, lets go.
Tom: In a galaxy far, far, far, away...
Austin: Great, Vince! See where you got us now, you piece off ****.
Bob: BSnP strikes again!
Vince: Please Austin, there are kids reading now,
Crow: I am not a kid! I'm
Tom: ...Vince...? Now where have I seen those names together before?
Crow: I think we have a crossover with the WWF.
Tom: (panicking) Why didn't Pearl warn us about this?
Crow: Maybe because she's the villian?
Bob: (confused) WWF?
(both Tom and Crow look at Bob)
Tom: You've lived for us
for how long?
Crow: And you don't know what the WWF is?
Tom: (to Crow) We must educate him.
lets find a way too get me back to the WWF.
Tom: If I see one more 'o' where it's not suppose to be, I'm going to hurt someone.
Austin: Me... me...
All: (singing) ...a name...I call myself...!
you always think about yourself!
Try thinking about some one else for once
Vince: I guess you are right we should.
Mike: (Vince) You should start thinking of me.
Tom: (Bob) You're on Candid Camera...no wait...
Vince: We should freeze?????
Tom: (Vince) Is it that cold here?
Austin: You... your blue?!
Mike: (Austin) I think
you're the one that's frozen.
Tom: "IT'S THE BLUE GUY AGAIN!"
Vince: And your friend is...is...is green.
Bob: Well, I'll give Vince
one thing, at least he's not colour blind.
Crow: (Bob) Matrix, I thought I told you not to eat the grass...
Austin: Ok, what is the deal with all off you and with this place?
Mike: (pats Tom on the shoulder) Let it pass...
Bob: This is Mainframe. I'm
Bob and this is my friend Matrix.
Vince: Matrix. What a good a name for WWF super star.
Crow: And he's just as smart. He'd fit right in!
Bob: WWF? What is that? Is
it a system of some sort?
Vince: No, but what is Mainfar??
All: (singing) ...a long, long way to run...
Austin: That's a nice gun there buddy.
Crow: (Austin) ...or are
you just happy to see me?
Mike: (head in hands) I saw that coming. I so saw that coming.
Matrix: You, I'd like to know
what's your name?
Austin: Well, they call me 'Stone Cold Steve Austin' but you can call me 'Austin' or 'Austin 3:16'
Matrix: Ok, 3:16
Austin: I guess that will do.
Mike: Let's hope so.
Bob: Let's go back to the
Principal Office so Phong can scan them.
Vince: I knew it! They are from the WCW NWO!
Bob: How does one pronounce
Mike: (trying to sound it out) Wic...wicw now... (shrugs) I don't know..
They're going too kill us all. Ahhhhhhhh
Tom: That's it!
(Tom starts to spin and his arms stretch. He begins to hit Mike)
Mike: Tom, stop that, sit
down and watch the movie.
Tom: (sits down timidly) Sorry Mike. Whoo, I'm dizzy.
Austin: Yo! Green guy! Use your gun to kill Vince.
Tom: And then after that, kill this fic!
Matrix: Ok. Gun targeting...
Crow: Not in public!
Austin: Kids, if you like mister green guy's gun give me
Mike: (Austin) ...$3000 and the numbers to all of your parent's credit card numbers, and send them to "I'm Gullible, System of Mainframe, (somewhere else)"
a he** ya
Kids: he** ya
Mike: Oh the language kids are getting away with these days? What's next?
Bob: Matrix! No!
Matrix: Sorry Bob.
Bob: No you're not!
Bob: Austin, you go with Matrix and Vince, you come with me.
Crow: Bob and Vince are
going to go pick out matching accessories.
Tom: (Vince) Do you think this handbag really complements the pumps?
(Everyone cheers and begins to get up)
Crow: Boy that was short.
Austin: he** ya and dont cry we'll be back
(Everyone sits back down. Crow beings to sob into Mike's shoulder)
Mike: It's ok, Crow...
Tom: Oh... that's original.... (gag)
( at the principal office
Austin: Oh my... this place is bigger than the empty space in Vince's head!
Kinda like the space in Matrix's head.
Mike: Feeling better?
Crow: A little. (sniff)
Vince: Hahahaha! Very funny
Austin: I know, hahahahahahaha!
Crow: (shocked) I didn't think it was possible, but this Vince guy is dumber than Matrix!
AndrAIa: What in name off all the Net is that thing???!?!?!?!?!?!?
Bob: (Matrix) Touch her 3:16 and I delete you...
Austin: Well hello there Miss, How can Stone Cold help you today?
Mike: (AndrAIa) You could drop dead and become stone cold.
And I'm not a thing.
Mike: (Austin) I'm a whatzit. Get it right!
Vince: This place keeps geting weirder and weirder
Bob: ...and weirder and
curiouser and curiouser
Tom: Bob. No more Alice in Wonderland!
Austin: Yup, just like the
thing in your head I believe it's called a piece off trash.
Vince: That's it! I'm going to kill you, Austin!
Bob: It always starts with name calling.
Austin: Give it your best shot!
Mike: (Austin) You have four balls to sink and I only have to sink the 8 ball!
Phong: Enough now! Please,
Vince: Cool! He has no legs, but he has a some sort off a wheel chair. Well, this place is no diferent from Stone Cold house.
Bob: Austin has really
old sprites with no legs living at his house?
Mike: Amazing what you learn in these fics, isn't it?
Bob: Yes. I wonder what strange and unusual things are at Vince's house.
Austin: You know what Vince?
Mike: (Vince) What? Yes
I do. Very nice guy. He plays baseball.
Mike: Second base.
Tom: (looks at Bob)
Bob: (shrugging) I don't know.
Mike: He plays third.
Phong: That's it! Computer,
Austin: What the..?!
( Austin and Vince both pass out )
Crow: Hey. I didn't know that if you scanned someone, they'd pass out.
Phong: That's better. Now, maybe when the wake up, they will stop fighting.
Tom: They're pro wrestlers! It's their job to fight 24/7.
( 10 minutes later, Austin and Vince wake up )
Tom: This is a ReBoot fic, right?
Crow: Well, the author did say it was a "REBOOT SEASON 4 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Mike: Boy, they had a long sleep.
Austin: Oh, what
Phong: I scanned you and your friend. You seem okay.
( Bob and Matrix enter the room to see Phong)
Bob: So Phong, what is your scan result?
Mike: (Jordie La Forge) The ship engine coils are shot and are no longer functioning.
Austin: There's good ol' Blue
Matrix: Blue Bird! Hahahahahahaha!
Mike: Is anyone else getting flashbacks from 'Follow that Bird!"?
Dot: Good one, whatever your name is.
Mike: Boy, she's got a short term memory.
Austin: Well, Miss, my name is Stone Cold Steve Austin but you can call me Austin and my dog here, his name is Vince.
Tom: (Austin) Sit boy! Sit! Goooood. Now roll over! Play dead! Now, see this fic? Now KILL!
Vince: Trust me, Austin, you're the dog.
(unenthusiastic) Oh listen to the insults. Aren't they
Bob: Yeah. How-can-we-stand-it?
Computer: Warning: Incoming
Phong & Bob at the same time: File?????????????
What? Mainframe no longer gets upgrades? This is a shock to everyone? Files
are now out of the ordinary?
Tom: Bob, shut up and read.
Bob: What?? Isn't the next file upgrade not for another 5 hours?!
Bob: Oh now they
use Mainframe time! Can't this author keep it STRAIGHT?
Tom: (pulls out the duct tape and gags Bob) Now, maybe we'll suffer in silence.
Phong: I don't know, Bob, but my scanners are not reading anything. They're gone! My scanner, it shut off!
Mike: (Phong, panicking) It got unplugged! What are we going to do?
Bob: Matrix, come with me.
We will check it out.
Austin: I'm going with you.
Crow: (Matrix) We still have that dinner and a movie planned.
Austin: Look, just give me a gun and we all can kick some behind.
Bob: Ok, Glitch, copy Matrix's gun. Paste to Austin.
Mike: (Bob) Glitch, use the extra hold crazy glue. We don't want it falling off.
Austin: Cool!, but how does it work??
Crow: Place it to your temple, then pull the trigger...
Matrix: You just say 'Gun: Target' and then you have a target with it.
Tom: Um...the author is
forgetting that Austin will need a robotic eye to target with
Crow: Well, maybe if we're lucky, we'll get to see a surgery!
Phong: You'd better move Bob,
Mike: (Phong) I've got your bishop right where I want it.
there's not much time
Bob: Wait! We need too prepare.
Matrix: I'm prepared. I don't need to take anything.
Bob: Yeah, but no one knows what came with that file.
Matrix: All I need is me, myself, and I...
Crow: Oh NO! There are
three of him now!
Tom: And I was just getting used to one of him.
and my gun.
Crow: And this being a kids show!
Austin: All I need is my stunner.
Bob: (ripping off the
duct tape) Like this one? (pokes Tom with a tazer)
Tom: Aaaaahhhhhh! Where'd you get that?
Bob: (grinning) Found it in the laundry room.
Crow: So that's where I put it....
Austin: You will know sooner or later.
Mike: Do we have to at all?
Phong: Guys, move it!
Mike: (Phong) You've got a bus to catch! You'll be late for school!
Bob: Let's go!
( and so our heros went to check it out)
Mike: (doing a very
bad rap impression) Checkitout! Checkitout!
Mike: Yeah Tom?
Tom: You're scaring me.
End of Part Two
Mike: (shaking his
head) This is going to be a long fic!
Tom: Can't he get a original title? He already used it once!
Austin: Bob, how are we going
to get to... well, where ever we are going????
Bob: We will take a CPU
Bob: But that's illegal!
Only licensed binomes can take CPUs!
Tom: Well they can't take your car, Bob. It never works.
Matrix: Good idea.
Tom: Hitting Matrix with
Crow: Bad idea -
Bob: Letting Matrix know you're making fun of him.
( 10 minute later
Bob: Oh now we're back in User time! This is ridiculous!
Bob, Matrix and Austin arrived where the file was. I don't really know where, because Phong's computer broke
Tom: So being the author he doesn't know what is even going on in his own fic. This is a really bad sign.
and they lost all the names of the sectors,
Bob: In other words, he doesn't know the names of the sectors.
so sorry, good luck,
Tom: (sarcastically) Thanks.
I'm getting to old for this )
Mike: You and me both!
Bob: Oh my ...!
Matrix: Oh my ...!
Austin: What the ?????
Mike: They make a terrific
Tom: Bob, Matrix and Stone Cold Steve Austin, the new stars of "Clueless 2"
Crow: Is there an echo in here?
Austin: Megabyte???? What is a Megabyte ????
Tom: Exactly 1,000,000 bytes. Thank you!
Bob: But how?? Glitch, wide
field energy beam!
( and Megabyte gets it right in the face )
Bob: You know, if Mainframe Entertainment does a fourth season like this, I'll kiss a null. No, even worse. I'll kiss Megabyte.
Matrix: But how? Megabyte died in the Web!
Mike: Whoa Bob. You have
a lot of faith in Mainframe.
Bob: I know Mainframe would never give me another keytool or give me another side kick other than Matrix and have Megabyte return in such a miniscule way.
Mike: This is true.
Tom: Only because the Megabyte fans would go ballistic.
Bob: I don't know. Maybe it
is not him maybe it's someone else.
Matrix: Ok, sure Bob, yeah ok. Someone said maybe in Mainframe drest has Megabyte, maybe I can Bob's autograph
Bob: (smugly) Well...
I do get a lot of girls wanting my autograph.
Tom: Did. You did. Now your stuck here.
Bob: (sadly) Too true. (angerly) Would you stop reminding me?
Austin: Guys, I don't want to be a party pooper but that thing is getting back yup
Mike & Bots: Yup yup yup, ahuh ahuh ahuh...
( and they zapped or has they say in Mainframe zip them self back in to the Principal Office. What a fast way to get from point A to point B!
Mike: "People living at
point C, being a point directly in between, are often given to wonder what's
so great about point A that so many people from point B are so keen to get
there, and what's so great about point B that so many people from point A
are so keen to get there."
Tom: "They often wish that people would just once and for all work out where the hell they want to be."
Crow: Gotta love that "Hitch Hikers Guide to the Galaxy"!
Got to get me one of thoes
keytools! Go look in Wal-Mart for all of you shoping needs or at Zellers
or maybe at...)
Bob: Uh Issa? Can we get back to the story please ?
Mike: Let's not and say we didn't...
Issa: Sorry Bob.
Bob: No you're not!
Phong: Your back!
Mike: (Phong) Your front! You're both here!
Bob: I know Phong and we've got a big problem!
Crow: (Bob) We don't have a plot!
Phong: Your telling me. Issa is here.
Mike: That is a problem. Self-insertion!
Issa (waves): Hi guys!
All: (waving unenthusiastically) Hi....
Bob: Not that. Megabyte is
Tom: There's the delayed echo from before...
Issa: Megabyte??? But how?? Wait a minute! I invented the story. I should know how this story ends.
Mike: Could we end it now?
Now, Megabyte is back ...
Tom: (singing) ...and
you're gonna get in trouble!
Crow & Mike: (singing) Hey la! Hey la! Meggy is back!
and he wants too...
Mike: Join the
Crow: Become a cross-dresser!
Tom: Join the rebelion!
Bob: Eat green jello!
Kids: Issa, please don't tell us the story. We want to find out ourselves
Crow: No, we don't...
Issa: Sorry. I'll go back too my office. Take it, Bob!
Mike: (Wakko) Where do you want me to take it?
Bob: Thanx Issa.
Phong: Megabyte but how did he return?
Bob: Return to
Tom: AHHH! Don't say that! I still have nightmares!
Crow: That was really low, Chome-dome. Really low.
Mike: They're right, Bob.
End of Part Two.
Tom: Shouldn't that be
'End of Part Three'?
Crow: He's trying to trick us into thinking that we haven't read as much.
Tom: Well it isn't working.
Mike: Call me picky, but there just wasn't enough of Stone Cold "saying so" in this chapter. . .
(Inside the SOL. Bob is holding a small pile of papers and reading the type on it.)
Bob: So, that's what the people from the WWF are like; unlike Stone Cold spitting out oneliners to diss his boss.
Tom: Right. If you should ever want to read a WWF/ReBoot crossover, it'd be Elektra's "WWF Visits Mainframe". Austin, and Vince are in character and it has Mankind and Al Snow with HEAD.
Crow: It's the most accurate one like it out there.
Bob: It's probably the only accurate one out there, right?
Crow: Yeah basically.
(Sirens and lights go off)
All: We've got movie sign!!!!