Report written by Silver Tiger
The first part of the film is seen in a bunch of normal seats on a normal sized TV screen, before they load up the ridefilm theater. We see a ridefilm pod being worked on by a team of binomes. Mike the TV pops up and talks about the machine, which will let us enter Hexadecimal's sub-consciousness and let us know what makes up the virus we know today. He then introduces us to Herr Doktor, who says in a worried tone that the machine is not yet ready for human use. Mike shushes him, asking him if he'd rather go back to working for Megabyte or if he'd like to succeed on his own. The Doktor doesn't want to go back, so goes ahead and explains the machine's workings to us, and the importance of the control remote that he holds in his hand which will take us back to safety if anything goes wrong. And he IS worried. ^_^ "If Hex catches us in there, we could end up as Weinerschnitzel!"
The film then ends and the Ridefilm clerk will hustle you up a flight of stairs into the main theater where the ridefilm seats proper are. The film starts with you now sitting in the pod you saw being worked on in the beginning, with Mike and Herr Doktor in front of you. You move towards a glowing portal.
Mike: "Please remember, that flash photography is absolutely-WAUGH!"
Cutting off Mike you dive into the portal and end up over a large sea of mist, in the middle of which is a Hexadecimal as a Statue of Liberty with a Hex mask on. There's a few giant stone statues of Bob, Dot and grown AndrAIa around you. Herr Doktor says that as long as we stay on the rails surrounding the statues, we're perfectly safe travelling Hex's mind. At which point we hear the voice of Hex. ("Oh really?") We ride to the end of the rails, and since it was REALLY bumpy I'm not quite sure but I think the statue of Hex smashes the end of the railing off. We go flying into a bright light and end up, as Herr Doktor explains, in Hexadecimal's infancy. We arrive in a brightly-lit room with four baby Hexadecimals in red jumpers (aw!) crawling around. (There's a lot of cute stuff scattered about. A scribbled crayon picture of Hex with the caption "me", a giant eyeball ball on the shelf, a bricked up window with the words "bad girl" spray painted on it. There's a poster of a full-grown Hex with the caption "Keep your eye on the ball!" with the eyeball ball thing on it. ^_^ There's one of Megabyte to the right of it but I didn't notice it in time to read the caption. Did I mention these rides JARRING? They are.) Each has a different mask on her face. One of the Hexes is playing with racing cars. Unfortunately for us, WE'RE the size of a racing car to her and she picks us up and puts us on a Hotwheels track. We then land on a xylophone, where another baby Hex swats playfully at us as she plays it. After bouncing off the wall, we see a young Hex painting a rather nice landscape with clouds before an angry-masked baby Hex stomps towards us. Mike and Herr Doktor start screaming loudly when suddenly we're transported to a flat, semi 2-D world.
Herr Doktor explains that this is the view of the adolescent part of Hex. "Almost cartoon like!" We fly around the faux Arc de Triumph in Lost Angels when a giant bomb drops in front of us, which gets nudged over by an equally large Scuzzy. (Mike: "Nice kitty!") Scuzzy snaps at us, pushing us back while Herr Doktor futilely tries to poke Scuzzy back with what appears to be either a stick or a lion tamer's chair. ^_^ We then see an adolescent Hex, (Mike & Doc: (screaming) "Inner child!") who has most of her crown spikes laid back, with only two of them lifted above her head (she has pig tails! :D). She's wearing a red skirt and top, with swirly gold patterns on it. She peers down at us curiosuly. "What's that Scuzzy? Oh throw it away! You don't know where that's been." Scuzzy punts us and we go flying towards and then through a billboard with Hex's picture on it that says "Art Show!"
We now fly through a seedy alley with a flashing neon sign at the end that reads (I think) Club Hex. There's a bouncer and line of binomes waiting to be let in at the front. We go down through a set of doors into Hex's Lair. She pauses before us, says something, then leaves and we go towards a whole row of Hexes, with fans that don't quite lift up as we go by (We ended up hitting all of them. Ouch. ^_^) and end up in the middle of the lair. The stone statues of Bob and Dot are there, moving together in a slow circle. Hack, Slash and Cyrus are there as statues too. Then Hex grabs us. "Shall we dance?" Tango music starts up. As we dance with Hexadecimal, Herr Doktor comments that this must be the manifestation of the full grown virus we know today. Then Hex flings us into the punchbowl (yum, orange!) and we float around, surrounded by bubbles and orange slices. As we hit bottom a squid with a Hex mask waves a tentacle at us and smacks us once. (The suckers go all over the screen.) Mike comments that the punch must have been spiked. (No kidding. ^_^)
We float up out of the punchbowl into a stormy sea with a ship in the background. Herr Doktor, deciding it's high time we left, desperately looks around for the remote which is floating on a piece of driftwood just out of reach. As he and Mike argue a giant Hex mask comes out of the waves and spews out fog which starts turning everything into ice.
Mike: "I knew she ran hot an cold but this is RIDICULOUS!"
The scene morphs into an icy slope, with mountains in the background, that we slide about helplessly. (There are iceboarding penguins in the background. Sorry, but it was going too fast to tell Feathers was there. ;) ) We skim around the rim of a bowl of ice, fall back as a giant Hex bursts out of the middle of the ice, then forwards again right into her clutches. Mike asks what part of Hex THIS is, to which the Doktor wails "The extremely ANGRY part!"
Hex: "Come to me, my pretties!"
Hex picks them up in one hand as she moves the claws of the other towards them. Herr Doktor scrambles for the remote as Mike grabs two of the giant claws and tries to fend her off. He begs Herr Doktor to just "Push the FREAKING BUTTON!" and the binome finally does. We're whisked backwards into the chamber that we started out in. Mike, recovering quickly, tells the doctor he knew he could do it, and how about putting the machine together again for another run? Herr Doktor just stares at him and falls over. Mike pulls a cord and puts out the lights.